Sunday, February 15, 2009

You know how the shower is one of the few places your mind truly wanders because you really haven't much else to do? I was having one of those random trains of thoughts that started out feeling frustrated how people often think I don't know anything about anything because of my age. Then I thought about what my mom was doing at my age. She had two children, tended to a house and had been married for 5 years. I started thinking about how someone in that position would probably start to command some respect for people and then I thought about what I was like at age 20 and wondered how my mom dealt with the challenges of being a wife and pregnant and a mother at age 21. How she dealt with the morning sickness and worrying about how to pay for me, whether I would be healthy, what I would be like as I grew. And when I was born having to deal with the demands of feeding me, changing me and tending to me when I cried. It's weird to think of myself as the way we all were once: tiny, helpless and the center of someone else's universe. Not only did my mom do all these things, but she did them really well. It was amazing to read some of the things she wrote about me in my baby journal once several years ago, talking about how much she loved me and how perfect she thought I was. Being a mother seems to be something she was born to do because she seems so natural at it. Even as an adult, whenever I feel stressed out or upset I know I can talk to her and she somehow always seems to have the right thing to say to make me feel better. My mom is amazing.